This is just a quick note that my blog is still active. Or at least the intent is there.
My last post since 6 January fronted my blog for the longest time, and each time I logged on, the intent was to update my journal, but alas both the mind and the body were weak and I either chose to continue my read or do some site surfing instead… I was tired after a day in the pastry kitchen … was it my excuse or my reason? Ha. Once upon a time, I was aching all over and my legs were puffy, now every task seemed easier and more focused.
I have been with a pastry kitchen for the last 3 months, and this stint shall end on 27 March, next Friday. I chose the day because it was the last Friday of the month. Whatz next? Many asked. I will be going to Osaka from 1-12 April, hopefully to return a greater inspired soul. BK will be there for a conference, and he asked if I want to tag along. Japan … of course. It remains my annual pilgrimage since 2000, and I made at least 1 trip each year.. oh no, not 2008, I was in Houston for half a year. I used my last balance of mileage rewards since my regional travelling days (2005-2008) to confirm a return ticket. This is going to be a patisserie cum boulangerie hopping trip, more than that, I need inspiration and ideas on what’s next for me. I remain free spirited, happily so. Then whatz next? I know when I am ready. It certainly makes me feel better psychologically than if I say I don’t know.
I have lots to update about the pastry kitchen. Chef K often asked me, “Are you ok?” Always, Chef, I am always ok. Chef commented I am always happy and smiling … Indeed, after 3 months, I remain so. Full of energy each time I don my uniform and enter the kitchen. I share a trusted relationship with the team I worked with, and I realised the results were almost always up to me to create. I choose to start well, I will also end off well. There was one particular morning, Yes! only that once… I felt tired, then I realized I was dragging my heavy feet, that very moment, I caught myself and I sprinted up the steps, and I forced a smile before I stepped into the kitchen, and the rest was history, I had a great day. I remembered a co-worker commented, You are always so happy and energetic… I admitted I did not start that day that way but I forced it and everything else went to the back of my mind when I was in the kitchen.
Till today, many were still puzzled why I left my last job which easily paid double what a pastry chef in Singapore would get … more wondered why I bother to work without a pay and yet still so committed. The few I shared with may not fully comprehend when I shared with them ~ I decided from that moment on I live a life with no complaints and no excuses! I practise feeling and being so each day. Not perfect, and still getting better.
I choose My Life. I appreciate what I have, and I choose to be happy right now! Indeed.
Regarding the training stint with the hotel, I appreciate that Chef K trusted me enough to accept me into the kitchen, the team trusted me enough that I worked solo in production at the work space allocated to the EQX team while they set up the buffet and high-tea, and some trusted me enough to share with me their hopes and dreams and frustration in their current roles. I believe I earn this trust.
I have lots to update in this journal for myself as I move forward in my life, the journey and my fulfilled experience at Hotel F. I learnt a lot and still do, I have 2 notebooks filled with recipes and notes, as the Chef Kris and Chef Philippe always advised … take notes.
Yesterday, Chef K returned to the kitchen after a week in Japan, he was there to judge a pastry competition. I informed him officially that my last day with the kitchen is next Friday. He said “I would like to employ you, but I can’t at this point…”, there is a recruitment freeze, officially or unofficially, facing the hospitality industry (rather, the market in general) due to the economic situation. I was happy I have a choice, I said “It is ok, Chef. I don’t want to be employed.” This is definitely NOT a sign of arrogance from me, rather I have not decided what I would venture in next and I made a decision last June to leave employment to venture beyond the pharmaceutical field familiar to me, I am not about to give it up so soon.
Till I consolidate my pix and my notes of my volountary attachment for the last 3 months.